#TBT: RUFF THOUGHTS: Growing past bad experiences


Just ran across this older photo from San Francisco around July 2012.   I’m the boy in the Leather Straitjacket.  Another version of the photo in my blog banner above.

It had been a VERY long time since I had done a public scene like this.  I had a bad experience with a inattentive Bondage Top about 12 years ago. That experience sort of damaged my ability to trust others with total control over me in a public setting such as this.  Yet, I still craved this sort of fun years later. Some fantasies just don’t go away.

Time goes by fast and so do opportunities like this.  “Up Your Alley” Fair (Dore Alley) was approaching and I knew this Leather Top that would be attending the event.  He was (is) a close friend that I trust and thought “worst that could happen is that he’d decline”.   Man, it was still difficult to type out the question!  After getting my dorky nervous message… he replied “It would be my pleasure to have this experience with you”.     🙂

That day came and I sort of expected myself to back out but he was great with taking control by making solid plans on when to meet and what to wear.    It all happened so naturally and we had a great time.  This day was very special to me and will always be one of my favorite moments as a Leatherman.  Not just because it was a hot scene with an even hotter friend in full BLUF Gear (WOOF!)… but, because I pushed past the hurt and got to live out a fantasy once again.  

#TBT: with Photographer Adam Kozik

A photo from about 10 years ago with my partner taken by photographer Adam Kozik. I recently did another photoshoot with another local photographer that had me thinking about this series of photos we took. That was a fun day with beautiful Chicago weather on top of roof tops and on train tracks.    Digital photography sure has come a long way since then.  

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Throwback Thursday to a time long ago when a lot of photos had a time stamp on them.

This was at IML 2004.  I had just gotten a “Joe Rocket” leather racing suit from eBay and wore it a lot over that weekend.  This was the first time that I had ever geared up so much that nobody knew it was me except for our roomie, “DCKidnap”… and the SIR I started flirting with while in the suit.  I actually got off in the suit while humping his leg in the lobby of the Hyatt.

RUFF PICS: Mystery Pup


Another photo from an incredibly disorganized external hard drive. LOL!

I think this is me from a visit to Mr S Leather around the time they had just released the “WOOF!” Muzzle. Or… it’s this very cute Puppy from the south that I met randomly during Folsom Street Fair weekend later flogging him in public at the fair.

Either way… I think it’s a fun candid photo.

One more #TBT: CLAW 2016

IMG_6479Skeeter from Mr S Leather asked me to be a part of a presentation on heavy leather bondage gear during CLAW 2016.    Well, I know better than to say know to “Daddy” and arrived a bit early to see my good friend Mr Kristofer was also going to be a part of the presentation.   In the photo above, you’ll find me in the Heavy Duty Straitjacket resting my head on Mr Kristofer in the Bishop’s Head Harness.    We were both rather exhausted after being bound so long but he took the majority of the abuse from “Daddy’s” boot.

That was such a fun weekend.  I’m very much looking forward to CLAW 2017.


(Oh, yeah… there’s some guy in the Leather Sleepsack on the table in the back.  He was so happy and quiet that we started to clean up after the presentation and nearly “forgot” about him)



Here’s a “Throwback Thursday” photo from about 9-10 years ago. We had just moved to Chicago a few months prior. This was about the time I started exploring my dominant side. While in my first Leather Cop Uniform, I put this boy in a leather racing suit, locking Bondage Mitts and the Bishop’s Head Harness you see in the photo. He’d been instructed not to get off for a few days prior and was very frustrated when I wouldn’t let him rub himself through the leather.

I love how this photo turned out and has recently made the rounds on Tumblr. 

RUFF THOUGHTS: “Life lessons at Dore Alley Fair” (& a #TBT)


Here’s a Throw Back Thursday photo of myself at Dore Alley Fair 2014.  

This photo reminds me of an important life lesson I “re-learned” that summer.  You see, I had a well known crush on these two guys for a long while. When we talked, my mind sort of fogged over. This happens when I am really into someone including the image/role that they portraying (“Totes Dom Top”) and the hot gear they are wearing. I got nervous and awkward around the 2 hot men flirting with me at the street fair as we drank warm beer…. freezing up several times in mid conversation.    DERP!  

I’ve done this all my life.  I call it the “Peter Parker meets Mary Jane” syndrome.  You remember that scene from Spider-man, right?

Right at 00:25

But, the lesson I re-learned… for like… the billionith time that summer?   Sometimes, especially at kinky street fairs, S&M can just stand for… “Stand and Model”. Despite the flirting, they weren’t really into me.  I mean, the fair was closing and I still had not been ordered to lick any boots or drink their piss!  Wake up, Ruff!   

I still look back and laugh at this experience.  My pooooor widdle heart was broken that day!  Awwww… Poor Ruffy.  (Don’t worry, I got over it)  And, yet, this still remains one of my favorite photos.  

….You know, looking back, it really didn’t help that Daddy Richard had me in chastity for 2 weeks prior to that day at Dore Alley Fair….  



A Throwback Thursday photo that goes waaaay back to our days living in Ohio.

I never gave Gay.com much of a chance even back when it was popular. Making it work properly for you was a pain.  AOL and “Leather Navigator” (yeah, I know! Remember that?) were enough. But, one day I signed onto Gay.com and this boy that looked like a shorter A&F Matt Damon from the south said hello. We talked for maybe 30 minuntes until I got annoyed with Gay.com’s poor *everything* and said asked him if he’d like to move things to an AOL chat room. He was so easy going and sweet that within a couple days we were already talking on the phone.

And within a month he was in the back of my Jeep like this.


I remember picking him up from the airport and saying “So, I know we joked about kidnapping you from the airport…”.

“So, let’s do it!” he responded quickly.

I’ll never forget the enthusiasm. I made sure I hit some bumpy rounds on the way back to our house for his first of many fun visits.


Throwback Thursday Pic from roughly 8 years ago when I moved to Chicago and did a photoshoot for Adam Kozik with a friend. Long before I knew the importance of putting your watermark on a photo. I’ve seen this one floating around Tumblr the past few years. It’s still rather flattering to see this shared so often.



Today’s Throwback Thursday is a picture that’s about 12 years old. My partner and I had been talking for a short while to this very cute A&F boy that looked a bit like Matt Damon (he disagreed). He had not been to many gay bars and wasn’t totally out of the closet. But, he was very much into the idea of being bound and dominated. Somehow, we talked him flying from down in the south to our city in Ohio. I had joked a little with him about kidnapping him from the airport but didn’t think he’d really into it. Like a good boy scout, I did bring some bondage materials just in case. When he got into my truck, he gave me a look of “Well? Let’s do it!”.

I made sure I took some dirt roads in 4×4 mode to make it a bit more interesting (although safe). I can still remember his giggle from under the spandex hood.



Today’s Throwback Thursday comes from Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco back in 2012. There was a guy walking around the fair asking people to write all over his body with permanent marker. He asked me several times that day. I figured… why not?

This was also the year that “Lady Bunny” stepped on my boot bruising my big toe to a point that I thought it was broken at the end of the day. Ah, Folsom. You never disappoint. DSC03985