I’m sitting here… in Chastity… with a Plug up my Ass… 


… waiting for my long time SIR (and good friend) from NJ to pick me up for a play date that’ll end fairly late tonight.


I’m blogging now, of all times, as a encouraging “No Send Letter” to myself. 


You see, Ruff… you don’t bottom enough.   You have bottomed 3 times in the last 4 times in the last 3 years.   Twice to your Daddy, once to a excellent Rope Top and lastly, once to the SIR who’s about to pick you up.   Each time you’re with your Daddy, he says the same thing to you.  “You need to let yourself be the boy that you know you are”.   And he’s right.  You hold yourself back.


The reasons are as good as they are lame.   Yes, it’s very hard to find Tops who have the experience and gear that you have.   Agreed, the bottoms always outnumber the Tops in any city including the home of IML and MIR.  But, you could make more effort to travel to the cities of the Tops you’re interested in. Much like you have today.


Yes, Trust is a huge issue.  You had that really bad scene in Atlanta that has made you overly cautious when it comes to bottoming.  Including to people you think you have a good understanding of.   But, that bad “limits not respected” scene happened over ten years ago.  You’ve certainly educated enough “Newbies” on how to communicate their interests as well as even how to pick up on the signs of a untrustworthy Top.  Shouldn’t you be following your own lessons by now?


Hold up.  Close your eyes for a second. Feel that?  That’s a Butt Plug. Feels amazing, doesn’t it?  The last time you had anything up your Ass was the emergency room Doctor cheerfully telling you “You’re not constipated. It’s just Appendicitis” just days after you had one of (if not THE) fucking of your life.    The (aggressive) Anal Sex and Appendicitis you had are completely unrelated so you need to stop relating the week in the hospital and month at home to fun penetration.  Even though you hate the mess and the wretched “Fuck Farts” that follow afterwards.  Deal with it.  It’s worth it. You love it, ya Butt Whore Wanna Be.


Lastly… hey… where’d your Dick go??    Yup, you’re in Chastity.   Remember that phrase you used to say when you wore chastity in the past?    “There’s an incredible sense of Freedom when you are locked in Chastity”.    And, it’s true.  The submissive headspace you’re in right now is possible because of the Chastity.  (Not to mention the Plug up your ass pressing on your prostate).  You… are not in Control.   Feels amazing, doesn’t it?    To let go…


The other thing about Chastity is that we both know the longer you are kept from Orgasm, the longer you get to be in this Euphoric submissive Headspace.    And… the longer you are kept from Orgasm.  The stronger the release (reward) is.    You love this.  You’ve been “behaving” for 5 days now.  Enjoy yourself.


So, yeah, that’s your SIR who just texted you saying he’s 10 minutes away.  Grab your gear bag and go enjoy some bottom time for a change.  Like you said when you started Topping 10+ yrs ago… “Variety is the Spice of Life'”. 


Go enjoy yourself, boy.


With love,
-Ruff