Check out this great article on Collars and what it can mean to someone.
A collar is well-known symbol within the BDSM community, but it seems that more and more often I’m seeing newcomers use the collar as simply another fetish accessory. They are unaware of the intense symbolism behind the collar, what it means, why it’s worn and why it shouldn’t be used as a prop. More…
Poppycock! I find it amusing that the author states that a collar will be unique to each relationship (agreed) but then goes on to describe a few boilerplate nonsensical rigid categories of what collars mean– what happened to uniqueness?
I wore a collar for a man I called Master and it was a very real and serious situation defined only by our own rules– well mostly his. I felt honored and accomplished and owned. Imagine my surprise when some leather expert told me I wasnt really collared because I didn’t go through a “collaring ceremony!”
Anyone who thinks of himself as an expert on my personal relationship immediatelt reveals himself to be nothing more than a dilettante.
As for people wearing them as fashion accessories? Tough titties. Leather is mainstream, and with that comes cultural appropriation that might not fit with traditional ritualistic meanings. Collars have all sorts of obvious connotations– you only have to have seen a domestic dog to have a basic understanding to build from without having read a single book in the canon. Welcome to the new world.
When I wore my collar in public, I never expected the guy at the gas pump or the chick at the grocery counter to get exactly what it meant. I certainly hope they noticed and that added to my humiliation as intended. The situation made my untouched cock hard and that pleased Master (as did the fact I was wearing his collar as ordered)