Recently, a new friend and I were chatting online about scenes we’ve had as a way to get to know each other. But, then we shared a couple stories about REALLY BAD SEX that we’ve had. After having a good laugh at each others’ stories, he suggested I do an blog entry sharing my story. While I do not consider myself a great writer, I think it’ll be a fun series for anyone who’d like to share theirs (email me).  You can, of course, remain nameless with the posting as they will here.  (Plus, I’ve already talked to the person about posting the story)

So, here’s one of my “Boner Killer” stories.

One time, at IML (Not at Band Camp. Similar though?), I was a little drunk on a Saturday night. I had already hooked up 3 (THREE!) friends with other friends that day and was feeling like it was definitely my turn for some fun. There was this Bondage Top about 10 years older than me. We had played with nearly 10 years prior. He was All American Jock-ish back then with an arrogant Top persona in the playroom. We had a quick fun scene back then. Why not another?

Anyways, so I lay there on the bed, in a awful loose Hog Tie. Trying to just let go. Be the boy. Relax. Enjoy myself.

Why couldn’t I get into the Zone? Partially it was how he announced that he put on some CK-1 Cologne “just for you, boy”.  But, mostly I couldn’t get hard or enjoy myself because his condescending verbal talk was beyond pathetic. I like Verbal Abuse but a mocking “You like that, boy? Whatcha gonna do now, boy? Gonna cry, boy? Gonna cry for me?” routine just didn’t work. Finally, he asked, “Everything Okay?” to which I replied “I’m sorry, SIR, but… can you Shut Up and let me just stew in bondage?“. He was taken back by it a bit at first but understood saying “Yeah, I’m sorry. Let me turn on some music”.

I was hoping for something Trance-y. Maybe some Nine Inch Nails. Or even Pink Floyd. Nope. I got “Crocodile Rock” by Elton John. That entire CD… on Shuffle. And he’s Humming it!

So, now I’m trying my best not to tell him that the music is a huge turn off. But, then he starts in with the verbal once he sees that I’ve sport a semi-hard on. The humming continues.  Totally embarrassed, I end up telling him “I’m sorry, this isn’t working. We need to end this”.  I’ve never had to stop a scene because the chemistry turned sour.  I really didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

“Yeah? Whatcha gonna do, boy? You’re tied up. You’re going anywhere. You’re fucked? Whatcha gonna dooooo?”.

I look at the Top right into his eyes during his unintentional Hulk Hogan impersonation reminding me HE is in control… licked my wrists and pulled both hands completely free in one motion. He tried to pin me down as “Tiny Dancer” bellowed loudly in the background. Pinning one of HIS arms behind HIS back I removed the rope around my legs and tried to politely dismiss myself.

As I go to leave, he remarks that we have the same Boots. I agree and ask where he got his at. He responds “eBay. Okay, think you can duplicate my awesome Hog Tie on me?”.

I can’t listen to Elton John without thinking of this story, looking  back and laughing.  As does the Top.